It is no secret that not only the addicted person suffers from alcoholism, but also their family. Alcoholism leaves a deep mark on the psyche of the life partner and the children of the addicted person. Therefore, in addition to the alcoholic himself, the closest environment requires specialist therapeutic help.
The destructive impact of alcoholism on the alcoholic's family
Alcoholism in the family is a huge emotional burden for all its members. Only someone who has been through such hell is able to fully understand it. We do not always realize that life in an alcoholic's home is a series of daily traumas.
ACOA Syndrome
Children of alcoholics are exposed to emotional wounds that will make it difficult for them to function in adulthood. The impact of a parent's alcoholism on a young person's life is so destructive that a separate diagnostic unit is called the Adult Child of an Alcoholic Syndrome (ACOA). Children who grow up in a home where alcohol is constantly present are subject to so-called parentification. They begin to take on adult roles much too early in order to be able to take care of a drinking mother or father. In the life of such a child, shame constantly appears, as if he or she was responsible for the fact that the parent drinks. This shame, if not worked through in therapy, will accompany the adult child of an alcoholic for the rest of his or her life. For this reason, people struggling with the syndrome ACOA have low self-esteem. Children of alcoholics they live in constant tension and a sense of danger because they can never be sure whether their parent will return home sober.
What is codependency?
Codependency is a set of behaviors and emotional mechanisms by which a person living with an alcoholic tries to adapt to the situation. Codependency may include phenomena such as a sense of responsibility for the partner's addiction, attempts to control their drinking, overprotective behavior. A codependent person does everything to "help" the alcoholic family member. They do not realize that in this way they are contributing to the deterioration of the state of affairs. In order to stop drinking, an alcoholic must realize that they are the only one responsible for themselves and their drinking. Through their actions, the codependent person, paradoxically, makes it easier for the alcoholic to persist in their addiction.
How does therapy for families of alcoholics proceed?
Therapies for families of alcoholics they can take the form of individual meetings with a psychologist or group sessions. The presence of other people who know the problem from their own experience is an important healing factor. The fact that family members also enter therapy and change their behavior has a positive effect on the alcoholic's recovery process. Such therapy is based on the assumption that the family is a whole and this whole requires help. The family is therefore seen as a system whose participants influence each other.
ACOA Therapy
During therapy ACOA participants notice and understand what a huge mark their parent's alcoholism has left on their lives. Sometimes, therapy is the first time a person realizes this. Understanding the hurtful dependencies from childhood allows the patient to free themselves from them. The patient begins to live in the present unburdened by past experiences. Well-conducted therapy leads to the patient gaining control over their life. It builds self-confidence and belief that fate can be changed.
Co-dependency therapy
Therapies for codependents always begin with noticing and understanding the existing situation. Patients stop trying to maintain the image of an ideal family at all costs. People using therapy learn to name their partner's alcoholism directly, instead of looking for excuses for it. They get rid of the feeling of guilt, they stop taking responsibility for the life of another person. Working with a therapist aims to make co-dependent patients stop living with the alcoholic in mind. Instead, they learn to think about their own needs. They learn to focus on themselves, on their own problems and aspirations.
Therapy for codependents sometimes it focuses on the beliefs held by the patient, especially those that perpetuate helplessness. The patient will be supported to cope with the fear of change and actively seek new solutions. Sometimes this requires a complete change in the perception of oneself and one's own possibilities. The goal is to give oneself the right to one's own happiness, feelings, expectations.
Summary
The presented therapy methods help thousands of people overcome the suffering that is alcoholism in the family. This gives me hope that you will succeed too. It is worth fighting for yourself and taking the first step now. Participating in effective therapy always involves commitment and the pain of growth. Thanks to this, it will be possible to free yourself from the consequences of past experiences.
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